A dear friend and I have been doing a recent study on brother/sister relationships in the body of Christ. Our heart’s desire is to edify our brothers in Christ and never act as a stumbling block to them, and are searching through the Bible for examples of what and what not to do.
In the midst of this study, I stumbled (well not literally...I didn’t trip on the book of Proverbs...) across the examples of the strange woman, or prostitute, in Proverbs. As early as chapter 2, the warnings to young men begin. These warnings are severe and frequent.
None who go to her return again, nor do they reach the paths of life.” (Proverbs 2:19)
“Suddenly he follows her....he does not know that it will cost him his life.”
(Proverbs 7:22-23)
Maybe it’s just me...but this ain’t good! And this is NOT what I desire for my brothers in Christ. And as a woman myself, I really want to take a good hard look at my own life and make sure that nothing in my character is similar to hers.
So I made a list of the adjectives and descriptions used to describe this woman, in order to know what not to do.
The first trend I noticed in her description had to do with her mouth:
-she flatters with her words (Proverbs 2:16)
-her lips drip honey, smoother than oil is her speech (Proverbs 5:3)
-smooth tongue (Proverbs 6:24)
-with her flattering lips she seduces him (Proverbs 7:21)
This tells me that as women, we have to be very careful in the speech we use towards our brothers in Christ. There is a fine line between encouragement and flattery. Of course we should be speaking words of edification and encouragement to every member of the body of Christ, but with guys in particular we have to be very careful. “You’re so big and stroooong.” might be on the verge of “flattering with her words.” ha
Next were physical attributes:
-do not desire her beauty in your heart (Proverbs 6:25)
-she captures with her eye lids (Proverbs 6:25)
-dressed as a harlot (Proverbs 7:10)
From these verses, we can draw the conclusion that she is a beautiful woman. Now, this does not mean that if you are beautiful, you are automatically a harlot. God wants us all to be ugly! (totally kidding) But from the other verses, we can see that it is not simply the fact that she is beautiful that entices men. It says she is dressed as a harlot. Annnnd last time I checked, modesty isn’t at the top of a harlot’s list. So we can conclude that she dresses very immodestly.
“She captures with her eye lids.” I am not really sure what this means, but the ESV uses the word “eyelashes” in place of “eye lids.” And that seems to make more sense to me...but regardless, she uses her eyes to capture men. And this is not good. So batting our eyelashes, making cow eyes, and turning our eyes slowly and dramatically upwards to make eye contact are habits we need to break and rid ourselves of.
And a few more traits are:
-cunning of heart (Proverbs 7:10)
-boisterous and rebellious (Proverbs 7:11)
-her feet do not remain at home (Provers 7:11)
The words cunning means:
“having or showing skill in achieving one's ends by deceit or evasion.”
So basically, she has a deceitful and manipulative heart. She achieves what she wants through lies and hidden motives.
In 1 Peter 3:4 we are commanded to have a “gentle and quiet spirit.” And the woman in Proverbs is described as boisterous and rebellious. This is just the opposite of quiet and gentle...
So her temperament is at odds with what the Lord desires us to be.
And the last point is a very interesting one. It says “her feet do not remain at home.” Isn’t that neat? What does this tell you?
“...to be sensible, pure, workers at home...” (Titus 2:5)
“...I want younger widows to get married, bear children, keep house...” (1 Timothy 5:14)
God has called women to be keepers at home. Yet the strange woman’s feet do not remain at home...
Are you seeing a trend here?
The strange woman is the opposite of a woman of God. Knowing the above gives me a list of guidelines, both good and bad, to judge myself by. If I see any of these tendencies in my heart and life, I need to humble myself and ask the Lord to change my heart.
“Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me and know my anxious thoughts; and see if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way.” (Psalm 139:23-24)
I want to be a woman after the heart of God. I want to be an encouragement to my brothers in Christ. And I never want to entice them or cause them to stumble.
This is my hearts prayer.
