“I want to have A LOT of kids.”
I’ve come to realize that this simple statement can act as a pretty reliable repellant. Use it, and you are sure to see faces of surprise, horror and maybe even disgust. Say it in the presence of most guys, and you can watch them make a run for the door. It’s quite entertaining.
Entertaining, perhaps. Disheartening, VERY.
If I was being completely honest, it is very discouraging for me to the lack of interest most young Christians possess in having a family.
I was raised by amazing parents, who loved me. I mean LOVED me. They gave so sacrificially to give me a wonderful childhood...I’m pretty sure I had the best one ever! :) But more importantly, they instilled in me a love for Christ and for family. They never failed to show me and my sisters that we were blessings to their lives. That they were so thankful the Lord gave us to them. And they raised us with that same heart.
Children are a blessing.
“Behold, children are a gift of the Lord, the fruit of the womb is His reward.”
Psalm 127:3
From about the time that I was four years old, all I wanted to do was get married to a godly man, and have many beautiful babies. Children that we, together, would show the same kind of love my parents did. It would be our delight to train them up to love the Lord, and when we were gone, they would carry on that legacy.
“Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; they will not be ashamed when they speak with their enemies in the gate.”
Psalm 127:4-5
There was a purpose in having children. Not to land our own TV show, or make people stare in wonder when we go to Wal-Mart, but there was an eternal one. One where you left this world filled with more Jesus-lovers than when you came into it. We can’t live forever, thus you leave behind your quiver full of warriors for Christ.
Now, I have to be honest. I thought this mindset was common among Christians. It was only after seeing the numerous “reactions” described above, that I realized I was pretty odd.
What discourages me the most is the reaction young Christian guys have to this. Not because I want to pick on guys, but because...I can’t really start a family without one. ;) I know many amazing Christian guys, who are doing wonderful things for the Kingdom. But they are doing it alone. A wife and kids would only slow that down. They are busy doing the stuff that really matters.
I politely beg to differ.
Investing in the lives of the “future torch carriers” is not a waste of time. Nor is it less important than other Kingdom work. All you have to do is read about all of the kings of Israel and Judah, to see how devastating this lack of interest in raising up godly children can be to the furtherance of Christ. King Hezekiah did what was pleasing in the Lord’s sight. He removed the high places, and cut down the idols in the land.
“For he (Hezekiah) clung to the Lord; he did not depart from following Him, but kept His commandments, which the Lord had commanded Moses.”
2 Kings 18:6
He was such a godly man. And through him, the Lord delivered Judah from Assyria. Hezekiah left a mark on Judah, and changed it for the better. But who took the throne once he was gone?
His son, Manasseh.
Now if you know anything about Bible history, you recognize this name. Manasseh was indisputably the worst king Judah had ever had. His wickedness far outmeasured any kings before him. He built back all of the high places that his father had torn down, he practiced witchcraft and divination, he set up the carved image of Asherah in the house of the Lord, and he even offered his son as a human sacrifice to the gods. (2 Kings 21)
“...and Manasseh seduced them to do more evil than the nations whom the Lord destroyed before the sons of Israel.”
2 Kings 21:9
Manasseh was even worse than the pagan nations that surrounded Israel! Whenever I read this, I marvel at the fact that he was Hezekiah’s son. How could such a godly man have such a wicked son? How was there such a disconnect between the two?
Scripture doesn’t give us a clear answer, but it’s safe to assume that Hezekiah had not made the next generation a priority. He had not taken into consideration the fact that he was just a vapor on this earth, and that someone else would have to continue the work he was doing for the Lord. And because he failed to mentor his son in this same love of the Lord, all the progress and changes he had made in Judah was destroyed by his own son.
Guys, if you’re reading this, don’t make the same mistake Hezekiah did. Yes, continue seeking the Lord and serving Him in the place He has you. Be that light in the darkness and preach the Word. But don’t overlook the fact that the Lord uses the family as a weapon for His Kingdom as well. In a battle you want arrows, and the Lord says children are those arrows. So arm yourself well.
And ladies, if you don’t have a heart for family or children, ask the Lord to change it if it’s His will for you. Yes, I know not all of us are called to marriage and family. He gifts some of us for singleness. But the majority of us will marry someday, and all I encourage you to do is get in the Word and see for yourself what God says about family. Let Him show you what is right, and don’t let our culture control what your perception of or desire for children.
As for me, this is one of those character qualities in a man that I am not willing to compromise on. My two non-negotiables are: he’s got to love Jesus with all of his heart & be about making disciples, and love children and see their worth and purpose in the work we’re doing here on earth for Christ. These are two qualities that are so very rare. But I’m willing to wait as long as I have to, because of the truths that I’ve seen from His Word.
My battle plan is simple: repopulate the earth with little Jesus-followers. :)
